NFCKNGSHT... did you see that?

in the pocket that was the actual beginning of time. babies were not born. lives could not yet be destroyed.
crotchal hawtness.^.

I was actually unaware of what I was doing. I had been stuffed into my bedroom for the dreaded afternoon nap.
Did the universe exist before then? Big Questions?

The need to piss is how it all began.

I was lying on my stomach and I remember moving my legs slowly in scissors motion. It felt good. I continued to rub hard between my legs, sort of like asking for directions to a place north of the North Pole. Most cosmologists insisted that it simply made no sense--that to contemplate a time before the big bang was like asking for directions.

It was puzzling—and wonderful. Working Together.
But with my little arms I was forced to go for a run.

Now I'm made of stone but I'm fairly sure that then I masturbated fairly regularly.